At the end of each year, I start looking forward to the next.
I do my best to take some time to be alone (which is hard as a mom of 4 kids!) and sit quietly (sometimes this means getting up super early, staying up late, going for a walk to escape the noise in the house, or hiding in a closet).
I want to be still.
To LISTEN to what GOD is trying to tell me.
This shouldn't be so hard, but it is.
At least for me.
I am not a sitter.
I am a doer.
Always on the move.
Getting stuff done.
Completely tasks and checking them off my list (which usually exists only in my brain because I do not have/make time to write out an actual list using pen and paper, and don't even get me started on typing one with my thumbs into some app on my phone).
Being still is about as hard for me as it is for a toddler to not ask WHY every 5 seconds.
BUT as 2019 was coming to an end, I felt like God was calling me to slow my busyness down.
To stop DOing so much and simply BE.
Not DO.
BE.
BE still.
BE quiet.
Be WITH Him.
Breathe.
REST.
I felt as though God was whispering ABIDE in my ear time and time again.
And so that became my word for 2020.
I just looked up ABIDE on my phone and Google tells me it has 3 meanings.
First up is accept or act in accoradance with (a rule decision, or recommendation)
Second is to be unable to tolerate (someone or something)
And finally, (of a feeling or memory) continue without fading or being lost
NONE of those are what I was expecting.
When I chose ABIDE for my word, I had been drawn to the passage in John 15 where Jesus uses the example of the vine and the branches to teach His disciples what a relationship with Him should look like.
In the first 17 verses of the chapter, I counted the word REMAIN 9 times.
Jesus starts the converstaion with His disciples with the most basic Gardening 101 lesson.
ONLY when a branch is attached to the vine, can it bear fruit.
If the branch is cut off from the vine, it's unable to bear fruit. It's useless, and worse yet, DEAD.
They all knew this.
It was NOT new knowledge to them.
They grew up in a very agricultural community.
They understood very well how vines and branches and grapes and wine worked.
Jesus took the familar and applied it to the spiritual.
He used what they knew about plants and related it DIRECTLY to their relationship with Him.
As we watch Jesus make the jump from gardening to the heart of the gospel, He explains He is the Vine. We are the branches.
"Remain in Me, and I will remain in you."
It's a personal invitation from God to us.
To me.
To you.
Come.
BE WITH ME.
Sit.
Breathe.
Rest.
Tell me all your worries, fears, concerns, and doubts.
Let me hold those for you.
And in return, let me GIVE you My wisdom, strength, hope, courage, joy, love, and peace.
Let me fill you with them, with ME.
Remain in me, and I will remain in you.
Doesn't that sound WONDERFUL?!
I feel like I am at the ocean, feet in the sand, waves gently lapping over my bare toes.
I can see the water for miles and miles and miles.
The waves keep coming, one after another.
I am reminded how God's faithfulness never ends, how His justice rolls like the ocean tide.
I think of how His mercies are new every morning.
That His love washes over me, day after day after day.
And then the screach of a child interrupts my peaceful moment.
Someone needs their butt wiped, or bagel spread with cream cheese.
Someone used the green cup when they KNOW that is their sister's absolute favorite color.
Someone ate the tiger vitamin and left her sister with only a hippo or elephant to choose from.
Someone can't find their shoes, or socks, or backback, or laptop, or iPad.
Someone forgot to charge their device, or pack their lunch.
Someone took the last coconut lime yogurt.
Someone can't find their red shirt that they *HAVE* to wear every Thursday and NO other shirt will do, how dare you even suggest 1 of the other 17+ shirts hanging in the closet.
And it's only 7:26 am.
Real life comes crashing down, making it real hard to "remain in Jesus."
ABIDING doesn't come easy.
At least not for me.
I want to retreat to the mountains, where I can gaze at a serene lake and see my reflection in the calm, still water. But I can't even go to the bathroom by myself.
I want to drink hot coffee and eat hot food.
I want to walk across the living room floor without stepping on a forgotten lego.
I want the laundry to fold itself.
And when are they going to invent self-cleaning toilets?
The responsibilities of life can overwhelm me, distracting me from the One who can help me navigate these rough waters of motherhood.
He's also really good at managing marriage stuff, job stuff (ANY and EVERY line of work is His forte), finanical stuff, or any other kind of STUFF you have going on in your life.
He's got you covered.
Even in the midst of the storm, the invitation is there:
"Remain in Me, and I will remain in you."
While the chaos is still going on all around us, we can CHOOSE to fix our eyes on Jesus.
In addition to the passage in John 15, God directed me to a verse in Isaiah 26.
"You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in You, all whose thoughts are fixed on you!"
And so that has been my prayer and desire this year.
I haven't been perfect, not by far.
I fall short every single day.
But every morning I get a fresh start.
And so even when life is overwhelming and I have lots to do, I want to FIRST take time to BE.
To spend time with Jesus in the Word.
I decided to stop using my phone and get out my Bible.
Ya know, the book made out of paper, where you TOUCH and turn the PAGES.
No more swipping.
Instead, I got out a pen or pencil or whatever I could find and started underlining and jotting down notes and even doodling some drawings.
I get interrupted more times than I can count.
My coffee gets cold.
But I tell ya what, my Bible has been read more this year than in a LOOOOONG time.
I am LEARNING to abide.
To rest.
To breathe.
To fix my eyes on Jesus.
To remain in Him, no matter what is going on around me.
In January, I did a quick water color painting and handlettered ABIDE in the middle.
I hung up my word of the year where I could see it every day.
Little did I know I would be "STUCK" at home every single day.
I had no idea there would be a STAY-AT-HOME order from the mayor, governor, and President.
I knew nothing of COVID-19.
Quaratine and social distancing weren't in my vocabulary.
And yet, here we are, 3ish weeks in to our "new normal."
In some ways, we have been "forced" to slow down.
To rest.
To BE.
I wonder, what if during this time of being "cut off" from the world, we CHOOSE to draw near to Jesus. To remain in Him. To abide.
Ironically, during this time of isolation, I have felt MORE connected to people.
My community has "come together" in so many ways.
We have put teddy bears in windows, done Zoom calls with teachers, learned sign language from our friends' new YouTube videos, dropped off donuts on porches, shared toilet paper, mailed unicorn drawings to friends, read books on Facebook Lives, supported local restuarants by ordering supper to go, drawn beautiful chalk art on sidewalks, sent flowers, and so much more.
As I rode my bike yesterday, I noticed how the trees were starting to bud.
The branches were full of "berries."
A friend shared on Facebook the other day how the Earth is coming alive.
Spring is here.
And so is HOPE.
Even in the midst of this pandemic, we can CHOOSE peace.
With all the unknowns swirling around us, we can fix our eyes on Jesus.
We can lay our worries, fears, concerns, and doubts at His feet.
He will carry them for us.
In return, He is ready to give us His wisdom, strength, courage, love, joy, peace, and hope.
He is so willing to fill us with Himself.
The invitation stands:
"Remain in Me, and I will remain in you."
And as I look back at the definitions of ABIDE, I am struck with how fitting the first one is for us right now.
We have the choice to ABIDE and "act in accordance with the rules" our leaders have put in place.
That doesn't mean life stops though.
We keep on living!
Like the 3rd meaning reminds us.
We can ABIDE through this time, continuing WITHOUT fading or being lost.
What if during this SHUT DOWN, we find our hearts being lifted UP?!
What if, even as we are separated, we continue to come together in creative ways?
We can be and MUST be intentional about reaching out to others.
Social media and technology are super amazing, and we can use them to remind each other we are NOT alone. We can also send "snail mail." Or tape encouraging words or construction paper flowers in our windows. We can wave from our driveways. The possibilities are endless.
We are all in this together.
And together, we will rise.
I pray, even as finaces are tight, the streets are empty, and our homes are filled with noise, so much noise, we can rest, breathe, and simply BE.
I pray we learn to fix our eyes on Jesus.
To experience His perfect peace.
To remain in Him, so He can remain in us.
May we ABIDE...
Who knew my word for 2020 would play itself out like this?!
As we look back on this weird time in history, may the fruit, and LIFE, and GOOD that comes out of all this truly amaze us!
